Five Years

Five years ago today, Hayley smiled three times, took her last breath and heaven got a little brighter...

Five years...a weird sort of "milestone" to reach. It doesn't seem right to have lived without her that long. And yet, we're five years closer to seeing her again. That is a happy thought!

Too tired to write much, but many thanks to all of you who thought of us today (and for that matter, who think of us on any day!). It was a day full of smiles...

So proud of our little man who delivered a wagon full of presents to the hospital and handed them over without fuss. Perhaps slight hesitation, but no fuss! Can you tell he was a boy on a mission?







We were thrilled to see three smiling old friends while there...: )

And I'm not sure it's legal to have this much fun at a cemetary...(though I'm secretly thrilled it's so). You'll notice pink was conspiculously absent...I guess that's what we get for letting Jacob pick the colors...



And though I didn't have my video camera handy, Riley made our day when she started doing the "Funky Hayley" chair dance at dinner at our favorite Mexican place. She was starting to gather quite a little crowd!

We couldn't help but look around all day and be so grateful for these special kiddoes who bring us such joy. And I know we appreciate them all the more because of Hayley.

One of the opening pages of Hayley's final scrapbooks has the following words...

"You will always be our first...
our first baby,
our first time to be "mama" and "dada"
Our first understanding of unconditional love...
Thank you for the chance...
Thank you for the journey..."

Today, on this five year anniversary, know that you are loved and missed...always.

Santa Love

So, for the past two years, our "Santa" pictures have looked something like this (pardon the poor quality):



And while I am glad to have such "classic" shots, it lost a little bit of the thrill on year 2. You might say we approached this year's visit to Santa with slight trepidation. Especially becasue last year, Jacob "seemed" into it. He talked about Santa all the time, even gave Santa a high five when he walked by, but when it came time to sit on that lap, he wanted absolutely NOTHING to do with him.

So, needless to say, I was thrilled when he walked up without hesitation at the CURE party last week and hopped right on Santa's lap.



He may have been a bit stoic, but there were no tears, and he actually told Santa exactly what he wanted (which by the way, was a tennis raquet, play doh and a coffee maker). Just to clarify, he's referring to a toy coffee machine he saw in a catalogue. I know - it's perhaps the most bizarre three-year-old list I've ever heard). But I digress...

So, with one child down (Riley wasn't at aforementioned party), it was time for another trip to see the jolly guy in the big red suit. Riley's teetering on the age where stranger anxiety is kicking in so I wasn't totally sure what to expect. And after the initial inquisitive glances,

our little girl fell in love.




I don't know that you can tell, but she was BELLY laughing at Santa Claus. Full out cackling. It might have been the cutest thing I've ever seen. (If only I had brought the video camera). And in spite of the fact that Jacob was back in stoic mode for the group shot...(Riley and Santa were really both rolling by now),



I wasn't sure our Santa visit could have gone any smoother.


And then there was this:



Insert contented sigh.